Speak for Yourself, Shorty! FMA version
by darkfire22
Summary: Ever wonder what would happen if the Fullmetal Alchemist Edward Elric met Gotei 13’s 10th Division Captain Hitsugaya Toushiro? Let’s just say the words of taboo are used more than just once. BleachFMA crossover. [COMPLETED]


**Title:** Speak for Yourself, Shorty: FMA Version

**Fandom:** Fullmetal Alchemist/Bleach

**Summary:** Ever wonder what would happen if the Fullmetal Alchemist Edward Elric met Gotei 13's 10th Division Captain Hitsugaya Toushiro? Let's just say the words of taboo are used more than just once.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or Bleach. If I did, this would have really happened.

**Author's Note: **I'm posting 2 versions of this. This is the FMA version, more of what Ed's thinking during this whole… ordeal, should I call it. That means there'll also a Bleach version I'll be posting in the Bleach section, which is more on what Hitsugaya's thinking. I encourage that you read both versions since the ending is different, and it'll make this whole story a lot funnier to read both Ed's and Hitsugaya's reactions of each other. It'll probably even be cooler if you read them at the same time. xD

Also, this takes place at the very end of ep. 50 and the beginning of 51.

* * *

Hitsugaya Toushiro, Captain of the 10th Division, sat at his desk, fluently moving his pen across the pile of paperwork that lay on it. He glanced up slightly, sighting the sleeping form of his Vice-Captain. Sighing inwardly, he continued with his paperwork. As usual, his Vice-Captain had a sake party, in _his _office, and is currently unable to help him with the mountain of paperwork that lay on his desk. He was just about finished with his current paper, when a Hell butterfly fluttered into the room. 

"Oi, Matsumoto, there's a Hell butterfly in the room."

Matsumoto, who had just been having a wonderful dream about drinking a year supply of sake, groaned as she sat up in her oh-so-favorite couch. Her head felt as if she had been hit by a ton of bricks. She looked up and found herself staring into the glaring, turquoise eyes of her Captain. Reluctantly, she got up from the couch and held out her hand, allowing the butterfly to perch itself on it.

"Hitsugaya-taichou, please report to Yamamoto-taichou immediately."

Without a pause, the white-haired genius stood up from his desk and ordered, "Matsumoto, finish the rest of the paperwork," before he shunpo-ed out of the room.

Right when he left, however, Matsumoto plopped onto her favorite couch and returned to her year supply of sake.

When Hitsugaya arrived at the 1st Division headquarters, he found Yamamoto-Genryusai sitting at his desk. The old man looked up when he sensed the 10th Division Captain's arrival.

"Ah, Hitsugaya-taichou, I need you to go to a place called Amestris. There's a boy, Edward Elric, he's dying as we speak. I need you to escort him into Soul Society."

Hitsugaya didn't ask why _he_ had been the one chosen to escort the boy to Soul Society and not some other shinigami; instead, he simply answered, "I understand. I'll leave immediately."

* * *

Edward Elric couldn't speak; he couldn't move, and he couldn't believe what he had just heard. He stared at the grinning face of his father's first son. Envy. 

Then it came. A searing pain shot throughout his whole body as he felt a sharp object rip through his chest. He couldn't breathe, and the metallic taste of blood caught in his throat. He gasped and coughed up a mouthful blood as Envy wrenched his hand out of Ed's chest. The alchemist fell onto the ground, lying in a pool of his own blood. Slowly, everything become blurry, and he before long, darkness consumed him.

Ed suddenly found himself standing in front of the Gate, staring at the center eye that inscribed it. He wondered what would happen to Al now that he's gone. Would his younger brother use himself, as the Philosopher's Stone, to revive him?

"Are you Edward Elric?" a sudden voice inquired, interrupting his thoughts.

Ed spun around in shock, and found himself staring at a short, white-haired boy who looked around the age of twelve.

"Yes. Who are you?"

"Hitsugaya Toushiro, Shinigami Captain of 10th Division."

The fullmetal alchemist gaped at the kid that stood before him as if he was crazy.

"You're a shini-what?"

"A shinigami, a Death God," the boy answered with hints of irritation in his voice. "Now if you would follow me. I'm supposed to bring you to Soul Society."

Ed continued gaping, having never heard of Soul Society. But that wasn't the major thing going through his mind. The kid had just said he was a Death _God?_ God can't be that _short_. The so-called "Death God" was actually _shorter_ than him. Ed suddenly laughed.

"Wait, you said you were a Death _God_? But you're only a kid, and you're shorter than me."

Ed noticed that the shinigami suddenly froze. He had no idea what was coming to him. After all, he had just called the God of Death short, which was completely true.

"Speak for yourself. You're not much taller than me anyway," the shinigami answered coldly.

"Who are you calling a shrimp so small that you need a magnifying glass to be able to see me!" the Fullmetal Alchemist shouted vehemently.

"Who are you calling kid when I'm about ten times older than you!" the short Captain retorted, just as fervently.

While Ed didn't like that fact that this kid-look-alike Death God was actually older, much older, than him and ordering him around, he gloated over the fact that there was someone finally older and shorter than him.

"It's good to know that someone older than me is also shorter than me!"

"You wouldn't be all that tall if it weren't for that antenna on your head and your two inch thick shoes!"

His fringe of hair and shoes did not make him that much taller than he already is! Ed almost couldn't resist the urge to clap his hands and encase the small know-it-all into a metal box, just his size. However, then he'll probably have to deal with a very angry "God".

"You would be _even shorter _than me if it wasn't for your spiky hair!"

Suddenly, the alchemist felt the atmosphere grow colder, and ice was beginning to form. Ed was disliking the shorty more and more as this argument went on. Not only that, he found Hitsugaya's voice extremely irritating, yet also unusually familiar, like he was arguing with himself.

"Your voice is irritating!" Edward stated hotly.

"So is yours," the Captain retorted curtly.

Gold met turquoise as the two diminutive geniuses glared at each other.

"You're still shorter than me!"

"Not with that antenna and those shoes!"

"That's it!" Ed bellowed, clapping his hands together.

"You're going down!" Hitsugaya shouted, his hand on Hyourinmaru's hilt.

Ed was just about to use his alchemy skills to trap the Death God in a metal box, when he suddenly felt himself disappearing. Was his body going to disappear before he got to, what's that place called, Soul Society or was it Al using the Philosopher's Stone to revive him?

Ed suddenly opened his eyes and found himself staring at Rose.

"Where the hell did that Death God go? I was just about to—" but the alchemist stopped went he didn't see Al.

"Ed, what are you talking about?" Rose asked in a concerned voice.

"What? It's nothing. Where's Al?"

"Ed, Al's gone. He used himself to bring you back."

Ed was stunned. So it was true then; Al had used himself as the Philosopher's Stone to bring him back.

"We should go," Rose suggested.

Slowly, Ed looked at Rose and said, "You go ahead. I'm going to destroy this place."

"Are you going to come back?"

"Don't worry about me," the alchemist replied, grinning at her.

Ed stood in the center of the blood-red transmutation circle, having drawn smaller versions of them on his forehead, chest and both arms. He was going to try and bring back Al using his own body. If it worked and he died, at least Al would be alive; and hey, he may end up in that place called Soul Society. Maybe then he could finish what he started with that Death God. What was his name again? Something like Hitsugaya Toushiro.

End

* * *

**Author's Notes: You have no idea how long I've been wanting to do this fic where Hitsu meets Ed. The two characters were just asking to be paired up together,** **being the short geniuses they are, and Romi Paku equals love. **

**Anyway, after some research, Ed is actually taller than Hitsugaya. According to the omake chapter at the end of FMA vol. 2, Ed is 165cm (about 5'4") including the antenna and shoes. Hitsugaya, however, is 133cm (making him about 4'4"), so yeah, Hitsu's really really short. But they made him taller in the anime.**

**I hope you enjoyed this since this has been the first fanfic I've written since 2 or 3 years ago. And if you haven't already done so, please read the other version!**


End file.
